Emma

This is the name I gave her - Emma.

I was in class 10th, when I first saw her and that was a crush at first sight. I guess high-school crushes happen that way only - at first sight. Since I didn't know her name for very very long, I gave her a name after her school only - Emma Thompson Convent.

What we do at fifteen, I wonder, how it becomes a laughing stock only few years later. And so is it for me today. I used to plan my schedules according to hers. Every market visit for comics was tuned to her school return or her coaching classes. As a result, I used to visit bookstall at noon during summers and late evenings during winters - weather was no issue if it was for Emma.

Once I went to play cricket in her neighborhood, just because that ground was in front of her house. However, I ended up being attacked and chased by a dog and getting a severe sprain and swelling in my foot. I was forbidden to move for about a month but even that came out for good. As I was confined to my room, I used to sit in my balcony early morning and as a surprise, I came to know that Emma is friends with another girl opposite my home. So I could see her every morning when she came there before school. That was the best summer injury I ever had and most inspiring poetic mornings too.

Once she tried talking to me, when we were in the street, waiting for a procession to pass. And I was so dumbstruck, I didn't utter a word. I know I lost that moment but who knows if it would have made any difference. And once I had read the whole telephone directory to search all the addresses on her street. Eventually, I discovered a lot about her. Like - family details, address, phone number, college, courses, and seven years later, her real name too. But her real name didn't matter anymore - she was, for me, Emma, forever.

Ironically, with so many memories, I have no picture of her. I don't even have my old diary, which had an almost day by day recording - had to tear that off due to some reason. It lasted for seven long years before I finally thought of moving on. Actually I realized by then that I don't have either the guts or means to make anything possible. Perhaps that was very typical of me - by that time, I loved her feel and image more than I loved her.

I wish if she'd ever know that someone loved her so much and for so long...even, gave her a name - Emma...!!! or perhaps, she does...!!!