Wednesday, May 7, 2008

Post future...

And when you're old, you run out of hopes and dreams. You just know who you are going to be and what you are going to be. Most importantly, being young or being old has hardly anything to do with the age, the same way as being modern or being wise hasn't. Its not about how many years have you been on earth but how many years you have lived inside yourself.

I no longer think much about future. I, sort of, know that it is there and it is coming. What lies beyond the next curve of space and what may appear beyond the next twist of time. That is why I have started living in present, and sometimes, in past - because most of my life is there.

I know that I am not going to write poetry anymore. I know that I will be a professor. I know that I will never be able to join politics. I will never have company to tread the globe. I will have more money than will to spend and I will have more nights than sleep in my eyes. But perhaps there is a flair left of that ol'buddy. Perhaps that is why, despite knowing all this, I still crave to learn some more languages, watch some more movies, and to read some more books.

Well, I do not want to have any regrets, or should I say, any more regrets than I already have, when I leave this world. And I want to leave like a contented man, like a man with more life in his years than years in his life. And when I fly away, breaking the feeble chains of last worldly charms and last few chains of affection, I don't want to be followed by voices that may hold me back. I'd rather prefer, if someone could play Bob Dylan...

Meet me Jesus, meet me,
meet me in the middle of the air
If these wings should fail to me,
Lord, won't you meet me with another pair

Lord, in my time of dying don't want nobody to cry
All I want you to do is take me when I die
Well, well, well, so I can die easy
Well, well, well, so I can die easy...

5 comments:

the do- dreamer said...

interesting thought! but don't u think its the unpredictibility & the incomprehensibilities of life which actually makes it worth living...& believe me when u think u 'know' sumthing, u actually don't!! fates do have a weird sense of humour!!;)

Designing the sails o' life said...

n u're not going to write poetry because......??????

u moron.....why are u such a pessimist

u have much more than many others who live in this world

to name one....ur talent in poetics.
man....if u stop writing poetry, at least 2 things will sure happen to u
1) i'll beat the c**p out of u
2) u'll write another piece about u're sad state coz u've stopped writing.

so dear pal....come back from that gloomy mesh of ur virtual world of pessimism n make best of what u have :)

i know i'm not a thoughful comment-maker....but what's the use in serving truth covered with sweet subtelities....u might miss the POINT :))

Sid said...

@ do-dreamer
Neither I can nor I intend to deny the unpredictability & the incomprehensibilities of life. All I mean to say is that there comes a time when all that ceases to affect one. I know fate has a weird sense of humor but sometimes, even fate stands silent and those are the times I am encountering. The times they aren't a changing anymore...

Sid said...

@ designing the sails o'life

Glad that you read that and gladder that you commented.
Well, I've said it time and again that I'm not a pessimist, although I'm not so confident about 'moron'.

On a serious note, writing or not writing poetry was never a conscious choice. When I say I will not write poetry anymore, only I know how much it hurts; but somehow, I cannot help it. It is not that i don't want to write poetry but now, it just eludes my senses and thoughts.

And by the way, I may sound gloomy or sad; I actually feel very light, perhaps because there is not any burden of dreams and desires anymore.

Designing the sails o' life said...

rubbish!!

u might be sad at times....that's ok! but hello....it's only u who can rebuckle urself up
if u give up.....it's STUPID >:|

that's the only reason why I hate most ghazals....those guys can't stop wailing
however sweet tuned they may be....i feel like they're drowning in their own tears (what they call their "lyrics")

smile n look up....there's the sun....can u see?
right there....beneath the clouds
it's waiting for u to see it!

look up friend.....it's calling u back to being sunny once more :)

my my.....i sound like a crazy therapist :p

but the underlined matter is.....Bewakoofi Bandh Kar :))

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